On most holidays, I tend to think about the shows or movies I’ve seen, or the books I’ve read that involve that holiday somehow (you may have read my Halloween post). The same is true today.

When I think about New Year’s Eve the most prominent movie that comes to mind is Sex and The City. Now, before you abandon this post, just hear me out, ok?

In one part of the movie it shows you what all the main characters are doing on the night of New Years Eve –  Miranda is sending her kid off to spend the night with his dad, Steve… Carrie, alone in her apartment watches a movie and eventually goes to bed before midnight…. Big is alone in a restaurant (thinking about his terrible life choices I assume)… Charlotte and Harry I think are making love or something… Samantha and Smith are toasting champagne in sparkly robes celebrating the holiday in two time-zones (New York and LA)… Stanford and Anthony are at some fabulous party having a terrible time…. and all the while that song “Auld Lang Syne” is playing.

And then Miranda calls Carrie – waking her up – to see if she wanted to come over, but quickly tells her it’s fine, don’t worry. But Carrie, knowing that it’s not fine, gets up and rushes over to her house, and when she gets there she hugs her friend and tells her “You are not alone”.

Ugh! Just typing that makes me tear up. Maybe it’s because I’ve spent a ridiculous amount of time watching the Sex and the City series as well as the movies, and I love those characters… or maybe it’s because deep down I feel some sort of empathy for them – for the women with their loved ones, the men having a terrible time surrounded by people, and especially for both the woman who feels alone, and the friend who feels compelled to reassure her that no, she isn’t.

And throughout all the emotions and life situations of the characters, Auld Lang Syne is being sung beautifully by a Scottish sounding woman. It’s sad to admit this, but I don’t think I ever realized how beautiful that song was until I heard it in that movie.

An acquaintance in a Facebook group recently posted the meaning of the tittle and the lyrics to Auld Lang Syne and that’s when I realized – I never knew what it meant! For anyone else who didn’t know, here you go:

The title “Auld Lang Syne” may be translated into standard English as “old long since”, or more idiomatically, “long long ago”, “days gone by” or “old times”. Consequently, “For auld lang syne”, as it appears in the first line of the chorus, might be loosely translated as “for (the sake of) old times”. (wikipedia)

The lyrics are as follows:

Should old acquaintance be forgot,…
and never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and old lang syne?

CHORUS:
For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we’ll take a cup of kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

And surely you’ll buy your pint cup!
and surely I’ll buy mine!
And we’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

CHORUS

We two have run about the slopes,
and picked the daisies fine;
But we’ve wandered many a weary foot,
since auld lang syne.

CHORUS

We two have paddled in the stream,
from morning sun till dine;
But seas between us broad have roared
since auld lang syne.

CHORUS

And there’s a hand my trusty friend!
And give me a hand o’ thine!
And we’ll take a right good-will draught,
for auld lang syne.

CHORUS

I’m not sure why, but for just about as long as I can remember, I’ve always found myself a little sad on New Years Eve.

Not outright morose or grumpy… just sort of subdued. I do appreciate the air of excitement and celebration and, of course the idea that a new year roughly translates to a fresh start and new beginnings. But always in the back of my mind there is the realization that time is passing and moments are becoming memories; things are changing and some people are no longer in my life and because of all that, some things are never going to be the same.

I know, it’s weird. And I’m not usually averse to change or new things, in fact I’m usually quite adventurous and open to new experiences. I don’t know, I can’t explain it at all really…. there’s just something sad and nostalgia inducing about the end of one year and the beginning of another.

Don’t get me wrong – I am hopefull for a wonderful, exciting, full-of-love, full-of-laughter, *hopefully* new opportunities, new year ahead. I’m just also aware and appreciative for all the experiences and situations I had in the last year. I’m also aware of the things I didn’t do, the chances I didn’t take, and the mistakes that I made.

And while I don’t want to dwell on those things specifically, I do think it’s necessary to remember and acknowledge them so that I can learn and grow from them.

“Each New Year, we have before us a brand new book containing 365 blank pages. Let us fill them with all the forgotten things from last year—the words we forgot to say, the love we forgot to show, and the charity we forgot to offer.” ― Peggy Toney Horton

And maybe that’s just what Auld Lang Syne is really about… looking forward to the future because of the past.

*

How am I spending New Year’s Eve this year? Watching movies with my handsome man, eating Chinese food, and toasting with champagne in our pajamas. All my nostalgia is being put into words (not tears) as well as all my hopes and dreams for the future.

To all of you reading those words, I wish you a safe, happy, and healthy New Year.

And for everyone out there who feels lonely or sad –  you are not alone.